Things Poppy and Caedmon said

Poppy: "Would you like some bastard on your sandwich?"

Me: "He's a country bumpkin." Poppy: "What's a country pumpkin?"

Seeing some solidified oil from bacon in the pan, Poppy asks: "Is that called 'tard?"

"It's too dry in the house. Will you turn on the humiliator?"

"If you just put on an external show for others to see, you're a hippo."

Me at Christmas time: "Wasn't there a German named Rudolf?" Poppy: "Yeah, of course. Rudolf Hitler!"

Caedmon:

2011Nov26: I gave Caedmon a little spider plant and a cup to put it in. I said, "What do you need to give it to make sure that it grows?" He looked inquisitive and started sniffing the spider plant. Finally he looked at me and said, "不gross." ("It's not gross.")
Skype video froze on a frame of Dad laughing, so after a few minutes of looking at his funny laughing face, Caedmon said, "Grandpa, 别笑了!" ("Grandpa, stop laughing.")

"爸爸我有点儿事 I want."

"摔down"

"脱off"